Letter to the Grieving Mom who Just Received the Diagnosis

Melody Joseph

Dear grieving mom,


I see you and what you’re going through. I understand how unbearable this day may be. The moment you got the diagnosis you couldn’t believe why something like that could happen to your baby. To celebrate today is bittersweet. You feel that it’s not fair. Why do you have to go through this pain? Why now or why again? How did others get the “get out of grief free” card but you didn’t? The moment you heard the ultrasound technician list off all the abnormalities they were noticing, your heart sank. There were so many unknowns and yet grief had already started. You may feel broken today and your spirit may feel crushed. 


I hope you know that you are not alone. Your pain and grief is validated. Your dreams and plans for that child are never forgotten. I want you to know that you are a beautiful mother that is worthy to be honored today. You will always be a mother whether you have a child on earth or a child in heaven. You honor them and care for them in different ways. The memories or words spoken to you do not change the love you have for your baby. It continues to grow. Your motherhood continues.


Motherhood is emotional and rewarding. It is feeling the raw emotions of the hopes and dreams you had of your baby. It is honoring your children that are on earth or in heaven. It is honoring your body and what you have been through. It is nurturing others in your life that you love. But most of all, motherhood simply is you. It marked you the minute you conceived. From then on, your baby was forever loved by you. It didn’t matter what the doctors said or diagnosed. They were and are part of you.


My encouragement to you is Psalm 34:18, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” On a day where many are celebrating or even holding brand new babies, remember that you are celebrated for who you are. You are strong and brave. You cared and loved a child that you never knew could hold such a big place in your heart. If you feel broken today, it’s okay. If you don’t know what to feel that’s okay. If you find yourself feeling peace or joy today, give yourself permission to feel that. The Lord is close to you when you are crushed. Be gentle and give yourself grace. Happy Mother’s Day to the special mother that you are. 


Love, a mom who understands


Meet the Author: melody joseph


Hello! My name is Melody and I live in central Minnesota. My husband David and I have two mini dachshunds: Randy & Oscar. They are our beloved fur buddies! We work at our family business, go to ministry school, and run a health and wellness business on the side called Eden Wellness where we are passionate about health and healing! In my free time I enjoy hiking, gardening, crafts, archery, and any outdoor activity!

I am a mom to three beautiful babies in heaven. Esther (8 week miscarriage 2017), Nehemiah (8 week miscarriage 2018), and Kanaan Asher who was still born at 35 weeks (Trisomy 13) on September 7, 2021.


Connect with Author: On Instagram @melodyjoseph1014 or at www.edenwellnesshealth.com


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