Parenting & Faith After a Life-Limiting Diagnosis | Episode 172 with Essence Reid-Oxley

Episode 172

This week I have the joy of interviewing Essence Reid-Oxley about her motherhood journey. During our time together Essence shares with me about her son Micah and what it was like to learn that he had Sickle Cell Anemia and then was later given a life limiting diagnosis called "Fetal Akinesia.”

We talk about what it was like to receive that diagnosis, what options she was given and what words of wisdom she would give to another mom who has been given a life limiting diagnosis for her baby. Essence shares how she created a birth plan and what her hopes were for when her son Micah was born.

Then we spend time talking about what it was like to parent her living son throughout her pregnancy and then after losing Micah. We talk about the kinds of questions that a 2-3 year old asks when trying to process the loss of a baby and how those questions change as they grow older. We talk about what it was like for Essence to walk Tobias, her living son, through that season while her heart was also breaking. The books she read to him, the way she talked about what was happening and what had happened as well as the ways they include Micah in the life of their family now.

Essence experienced another devastating loss just earlier this year, not even a year after losing her son Micah and we spend some time talking about what that was like for her, how she is pursuing healing and what her relationship with God looked like amidst all the loss and grief.

This conversation is honest and incredibly hopeful – I know it will bless you.

QUESTIONS we discuss IN EPISODE 172

What surprised you most about loss and the grief journey?
What would you say to a woman who has just received a life-limiting diagnosis? What do you wish someone would have said to you?
Let’s talk about parenting amidst such devastating news. How old was your son Tobias at the time of the diagnosis given for Micah?
What was it like to walk him through that season while your heart was also breaking?
How did you talk to him? How did you explain what was happening?
What other challenges did you face in parenting Tobias after you lost Micah? How did you navigate those challenges?
How do you help Tobias grieve and cope?
Are there any resources that have been helpful to you in parenting after loss?
What has it looked like for you to include Micah in the life of your family now?
You suffered another loss after losing your son Micah. What was it like to experience another loss?
What has healing looked like for you? Spiritually, emotionally and mentally?
What did/has your relationship with God look like in this season?
What has it practically looked like to maintain a healthy relationship with God in this season?

MEET Essence

Essence is the mother of 2 boys, Tobias who is 5 years old, and Micah Joseph who passed away shortly after he was born. She is a photographer, a lover of basketball, music, and Jesus. She has been married to her husband Gabriel for 10 years.